Life is scary. 
     A few days ago my friend asked me "how life was," and so I told him, "Exhausting, beautiful, surprising, tiring, amazing, astonishing, enlightening, and in no way relaxing, but in every way worth it." He told me that that was truly wonderful. That which had come together with a few words that I had strung effortlessly to give an intellectual and truthful answer meant so much to him. But then I remembered what I had forgotten to tell him: Life is scary. And when I told him this, he became confused. 
     "Why? I mean... I guess it could be.. But why?" He asked.
     So then I so sincerely replied, "Life is scary, and breath-taking, and confusing, and fantastic. But it is so, so scary. I love a kid who lives 2,069 miles away from me. And I will always know that we could never give one another exactly what we need or want. I cannot go to his fencing tournaments on the weekends and cheer him on. I cannot go to his concerts and be there to support him. I cannot go to his house when I am truly upset, and I will never have the comfort of having him wrap his arms around me and tell me everything is going to be okay. And that scares me. How can I love such a person who cannot always be there? How can I ever know that everything will be okay? 
     Also, there are so many other things in life that I want to do, but I am just too scared. It is not the world that limits us, but it is us who limits ourselves and later blames it on the world as we try and compensate for the questions left unanswered. But life is not a question that is mean to be answered, and we all need to realize that. All things will end; John Green once said, "That which comes together will fall apart imperceptibly slowly." (Looking for Alaska p.219) If we all realized that, if we all took time away from either our care-free or our stressful jam-packed lives we would realize that: that which comes together will inevitably fall apart. In that way, life is downright scary. But what we must also realize is that we must embrace what we fear and live the life we wish we had. Because the mystery of what will come, the terrifying unknown, and the rare happiness that all people strive to find; that is what makes life the beautiful thing that it is."
     I thought this was important to share with you, Dream Box. Be careful of how you live, but never be ashamed of how you live your life as long as you are happy. Have a great day, and stay beautiful, Lovelies. 
      Best Wishes, Nat <3
03/04/2012 10:36pm

post more of the "dear alexander" letters!


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